grow through what you go through

I feel like it would be repetitive of me to say “i’ve learned a lot this year but one of the most important things i’ve learned is…” so we’re just gonna skip that part.

if I’ve been guilty of anything in my life, its been taking things for granted and something tells me im not alone in that. whether its things, people, moments or places. but here’s the thing about taking things for granted; you don’t realize you’re doing it until its too late.

I spent SO much time worrying about the little things, holding grudges, obsessing over the future, etc. so much of my energy had been spent on toxicity that it began to consume me. I spent so much time complaining about how busy I was, how little time I had.

if you’ve been reading my blog for a little bit, you know that I lost my dad when I was 20 years old. what you don’t know is that I almost lost my mom 4 years after that (more on that next week). if losing one parent and almost losing the other didn’t put things into perspective, i’m not sure what would have. it started with my dad. I started to think about all of the things I should’ve asked him, should’ve told him, all of the things he would miss and how i’d do anything for him to be here. and then my mom got sick, I started to have even more of those thoughts. what if I lost her too?

it didn’t stop there. im a nurse so at baseline, I see things every single day that make me stop and appreciate the little things in life. then, IRL (in real life if you’re not a Gen Z-er) stage 4 cancer at 30 years old, emergency craniotomies and open heart surgeries before you turn 28, benign (thank god) brain tumors, losing battles with mental health and addiction, car accidents, plane crashes, a pandemic. you get the picture.

the point is, you literally NEVER know. you NEVER know what tomorrow brings, for you or the people you love and I hope you never have to learn that the hard way.

so what did I do about it? how did I stop taking everything in life for granted? (hint: part of the answer costs me a lot of money and occurs every week) yes, therapy. BUT it is something I have to actively work on every single day. and if you’ve been following along on this journey at all and you take anything from these silly blog posts then please let it be this.

all you have is time. so make the most of it. make the memories.

make the hard choices
have the tough conversations
book the trip
apply for the new job
get another tattoo
spend the time you do have with the people that light up your life
stop wasting that time on the people that don’t
sell the house
go on the first date (it’s not as scary as it sounds)
get outside
laugh
let it go
tell them you love them.

you never know when you won’t have more time. you never know if you’ll get a second chance at life, or love. so if you do, take it and RUN. run like hell and don’t look back.

“what total dipshit thinks the point of life is anything other than to live it”

• bearing the unbearable: joanne cacciatore, phd
• tiny beautiful things: cheryl strayed

• how do I do this: kelsea ballerini
• hard days: brantley gilbert
• one life: mike perry